Robin Hawke


The Bundle
September 21, 2011, 2:29 PM
Filed under: All Writing Challenges | Tags: ,

Fear grew. Each time, the doctor reassured her, “All babies develop at different rates. He’ll catch up. You’ll see.”

She carried him everywhere, sang to him all day. He could hear her, but, except for the crying, oh the crying, that incessant yowling, didn’t say a word.

Moira began to avoid her play group, appointments. Her sweet songs turned shrill.

“They say you’ll be so cute with words…out of the mouths of babes, they say. I don’t care. Just say one word, one. Please, for mama?”

The round eyes didn’t blink; the narrow ears quivered; the ugly mouth sneered.

100 Words for Grown Ups

The prompt this week is: …out of the mouths of babes….Click to read entries.

Advertisements

14 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Ooh creepy, I thought I could see where you were going, but that last line … made me shudder. Excellent.

Comment by Alison Green

I’m creeped out too! Imagination always has more power than I give it credit–and I give it a lot of credit. Robin

Comment by robinhawke

I really like this piece, Robin. It is so bleak and contrasts brilliantly with the other contributions – not an easy thing to do, well done!

Comment by Dughall McCormick (@dughall)

Thank you!

Comment by robinhawke

A chilling piece of horror does contrast interestingly with this prompt, and you built it up wonderfully in just a hundred words.
I had a “Rosemary’s Baby” moment there! I like this a lot.

Comment by Sparks In Shadow

Hey, Robin, glad you penned a dark one, thought I was the one with the warped imagination. This is really chilling and disturbing. Terrific! b–d

Comment by ventahl

Yikes! Well done. laurie

Comment by laurie

I really liked this. When I read the last line I just had to read the piece again to see what hindsight added. Really creepy.

Comment by Sally-Jayne

oooh very creepy. I really like this. Excellent take on the prompt x

Comment by Susan Mann

Thank you everyone. I promise I’m normal. I don’t even like scary movies. Robin

Comment by robinhawke

Great piece of suspense/horror writing. Am a real Stephen King fan and you have managed to portray a very vivid scene in so few words; would be a good one to carry on…

Comment by Anna

Oh crumbs! What an ending! I was expecting a wonderful word issuing from that mouth. Brilliant writing R!

Comment by jfb57

Perfect for October. I was reminded of ‘Rosemary’s Baby’ while reading your flash fiction. Good job!

Comment by writingfeemail

LOL I’m not able to stomach much horror–I remember only reading 1/3 of Rosemary’s Baby before I put it down, unable to reconcile that reality with my preference for something far more encouraging…

Robin

Comment by Robin Hawke




Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s



%d bloggers like this: