Robin Hawke


Ablution
November 19, 2011, 3:06 PM
Filed under: All Writing Challenges | Tags: , ,

Ellie loved the lake in front of her house at the foothills of the Appalachians. She swam daily in the jade waters. It didn’t feel like exercise; she liked to imagine she belonged in water. At the end of her swim, Ellie turned over to float on her back, her long white hair fanning out like a halo.

While her breathing calmed, Ellie’s feet drifted down to the bottom of the lake. When her legs became leaden, her swim was over. Without urgency, she waded up the embankment.

After the heavy snow, they found her floating, gaseous, blue and white.

Read entries to the prompt...snow...

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11 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Here I was, all relaxed and then bam! One sentence hits me like a brick.

Comment by wcdameron

I can’t tell you how pleased I am with your comment–I was hoping for this reaction. Robin

Comment by Robin Hawke

dang!

Comment by barbara

Kapow! Robin, you never cease to amaze with your concise, yet overflowing sentences. What a stunner that last one is.

Comment by Louise Jaques

Wow! What a great entry inspired by ablution. Did you get the idea off my blog? It’s awesome!

Comment by TheWritingReader (@WritingReader)

I discovered the title after the writing which came after an image of floating hair. On the other hand, I read your prompt earlier in the week. It reminded me of an elderly man who used the word, ablutions, to excuse himself. Inspirations mesh somehow, don’t they?

Robin

Comment by Robin Hawke

Synchronicity rocks!

Comment by TheWritingReader (@WritingReader)

Wow just wow. x

Comment by susankmann

I’m sure you intended this, but I’m left wondering if it was suicide or just a tragic accident. Either way, stunning and macabre.

Comment by Velvet Verbosity (@velvetverbosity)

Or a health crisis…I do think it was quick. Robin

Comment by Robin Hawke

[…] Robin Hawke posts flash fiction every day. This week, one of her offerings dovetailed with one of my prompts, Ablution. […]

Pingback by Carnival of Creativity 11/20/2011 | The Writing Reader




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