Robin Hawke


A Summer Day
December 14, 2011, 9:00 PM
Filed under: All Writing Challenges | Tags: ,

This was life: salt water, my friend Ayres, and a large, green bottle of champagne. We waded, me in Spanish army boots with a suit hiking up my cheeks, her in a loose mens’ shirt. Low country waves smacked our knees on a day buttery with sunshine.

Our spirits drifted higher on each retold joke. She had the laugh to go with her goddess locks, the ones that went below her hips. Ayres loved a bargain, in humor and other departments. Today’s bargain: fresh crab.

I caught our dinner by throwing rotting chicken thighs out twelve feet to play mind games with blue crab. If I fiddled, pulled sideways when the crabs backed off, acted as if my poultry was distressed—I could tow the malcontents up my green boots. They’d hang on, sure of grip. She’d bend, wet strands of hair tangling with the crabs she netted.

Over frothing mouths, we drank our bubbly. We threw the females onto sand and watched them skitter back to water. I’d run beside them, feeling the sun burn my nose. When I ran back up the beach, we polished the champagne.

That night we enjoyed spicy boil and sweet crab with brown beer. We picked at shells, saving the claws for last. Turning to the television for the tides, we charted our next day’s venture as hunters.

Tandem divorces pulled at our friendship. When the bill collectors insisted on their due, she stopped answering phone calls, mine among them. Two years later, Ayres died of cancer. I lacked the green for a flight to see her put in the ground. The bargain—our good company—terminated in brine water.

Click to read more...Inspiration Mondays prompts...mind games...

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10 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Whooooooooosh, amazing.

Comment by Craig Towsley

Thanks…this one took longer than expected and I’m still unhappy with some of the transitions. It was good to get working again, though.

Comment by Robin Hawke

Oh my god, I will never get over how you always manage to pull out such punchy and magnificent endings. I just love this.

Comment by Louise Jaques

I managed with at least ten revisions of that last sentence, and I’m not exaggerating! I started along the lines of: Death never haggled.

Thanks for the praise…made my day, Robin

Comment by Robin Hawke

Wow, that one punched me in the stomach! I remember hunting for crabs on the outer banks of NC. This story took me back there.

Comment by wcdameron

Sorry bout that? No, glad it connected. I have a feeling it was because you’re a good friend. Robin

Comment by Robin Hawke

I felt like I was there. Fantastic descriptions. And I echo wcdameron – punch in the stomach at the end!

Comment by bekindrewrite

Thanks!

Comment by Robin Hawke

[…] Robin […]

Pingback by Inspiration Monday: no time to bleed « BeKindRewrite

Beautiful, and bittersweet, writing! Unexpected twist, and I like how the green ended up betraying him.

Comment by Kirsten




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